Wednesday, July 8, 2009

Baseball, Apple Pie, & False Patriotism

So I've had a few days to reflect upon my July 4th weekend, a time of mixed emotions for me since my feline friend of 16.5 years, "Bill the Cat", died on July fourth of last year. Despite this sad reminder, I did enjoy an outstanding weekend of baseball(Rangers swept Tampa), apple pie, and love of country. Unfortunately, I was also subjected to numerous incidents of dishonest, false patriotism. Even though these incidents annoyed the shiite out of me, I was going to abstain from posting an angry diatribe here on the Interwebs. Then I ran across this story. Several of my biggest soap-box "buttons", dear readers, were subsequently pushed.

Seems that in August of 2008, this unfortunate fan at Yankee Stadium decided to go take a whiz during the 7th inning stretch singing of that annoyingly false anthem, "God Bless America". Said Whizzer was ushered out of the stadium by the NYPD under the pretense of "drunk and disorderly conduct". The man says he had two overpriced beers...one hour apart.

Now, I wouldn't blink an eye if this story took place here in Jesusland(Texas), hell, I'm surprised the Jesus-Police haven't already locked me up for my deliberate butt-planting at Rangers Ballpark during the 7th innning stretch. But [NASCAR Redneck Voice] Newww York City? [\NASCAR Redneck Voice] That bastion of Blue State, "progressive" thought? I couldn't believe what I was reading. I did some additional reading-up on this, only to find out that this was an ongoing issue at Old Yankee Stadium, and that stadium ushers used to chain up aisle barriers to prevent people from leaving their seat during "God Bless America". Again, in Newww York City?!? No freakin way!

Then I had to remind myself that Newww York City is also the country's petri dish of Nanny-State thought leading us down the road to, yes, I'm going to say it: a Police State. You scoff. I can hear you scoffing through the Interwebs, really. But think about this for a sec. A citizen of this "free" country was ejected from a baseball game because he was being "disrespectful to his country". He failed to obediently stand during a fking song! The Jackboot who ejected the man pulled the "drunk and disorderly" card, which is Orwellian Police-State code for "Urinate on the Bill of Rights". Fortunately, the man sued Newww York City and won.

ANYWAY, while I was surprisingly not jack-booted from Rangers Ballpark this weekend, I was subjected to our ballpark PA announcer's false-patriotic preamble to the singing of GBA...he always says something to the tune of "To honor our men and women serving in the armed forces around the world, please stand as [some twit] sings "God Bless America". No thank you. I will honor our service folks by keeping my rather large buttocks planted firmly in my undersized, maximum attendance-generating seat. "But why?", you ask with incredulous indignance. Simple. What the hell are our members of the armed services (alledgedly)fighting for, or more appropriately, against? They are fighting against this exact form of false patriotism, a.k.a. Islamacism, a.k.a. Theocracy, a.k.a. Marriage of Church and State.

How do we combat this domestically? Easy. Start with the Separation of Church and Baseball: keep your hiny planted during "God Bless America".

I refuse to embarass myself by believing in Bronze Age fairy-tales, yet I still bleed red, white, and blue. Imagine that.

2 comments:

Kent McManigal said...

I'd be a lot more likely to bleed yellow, black, and green (the colors of the Gadsden flag and my own modification thereof, the Time's Up flag) if I weren't already filled with regular blood. ;)

I try my BEST to avoid any place that hymns to the state will be blared at me, since I refuse to participate in the worship service.

The Whited Sepulchre said...

Unbelieveable. I, too, had a "Bill The Cat". Miss him terribly.
Good post, BTW.